Monday, November 03, 2008
realizations
i just had this huge realization kagabi..so huge na i wish i've had it sooner..para hindi sana ako nagpakagaga nang ganito..
i don't think i was ever in love with dave..i was more in love with the IDEA of him..alam mo yun, yung a guy na mabait, masipag, ok kausap tapos napapatawa ako..para bang i was so blinded by the good stuff na hindi ko na napansin yung mga maling ginagawa nya at yung mga negative stuff sa kanya..
siguro if i was in love, i was in love with the guy i thought he was..yung guy na nakilala ko before, yung guy na tinetext ako kahit unli sya sa smart at globe ako, yung guy na laging tumatawag sa bahay at nakakausap ko sa phone 'til madaling araw..yung guy na nagpupunta kina eileen kasi he knows na doon ako tumatambay after class..the guy who reviews me pag may exam ako the next day..yung guy na nanginginig pa yung kamay habang tinuturuan kong magrubix cube haha..yung malambing na masarap kayakap na guy..
don't get me wrong nag-eenjoy parin naman ako pag kasama ko sya eh, naiinis na nga minsan sina ate jona sakin kasi parang sya nalang bukambibig ko dati (take note dati to ah) kaso nung nagtagal kasi hindi ko na nakita yung dating dave sa kanya eh..parang ibang tao na talaga..pero i was still convinced na i had feelings for him (see my previous blog entries) kasi i thought the guy i fell for is still there, sa loob non..and one day babalik din yung guy na yun at magiging ok rin lahat..
eh parang hindi babalik..haha..tapos this sem sobrang hindi kami masyado nagkasama, dahil narin sa work at school sched ko and busy daw sya sa acads kaya yun..i started to miss him and long for him pero now i know na i was missing him and longing for him earlier pa, from the time na i was hoping na bumalik sya dun sa dati..until i reached the point where i stopped missing him..kasi he never gave me a reason to miss him again..
alam mo yun after ng lahat-lahat hindi man lang nagparamdam..i know, my fault, nagkaboyfriend ako then nagka-no commitments thing after that..pero still, almost a month of no communication? kahit text nga wala eh..pero i guess mali ko rin yun kasi i didn't text him as well? hay ewan haha..
tapos ngayon bigla syang magpaparamdam na para bang walang nangyari? hay nako..bahala sya..haha antaray eh noh? phew..glad that's out..parang ang gaan sa pakiramdam..
so now..eto..kung dati single but not searching, i'm now searching narin..haha..friends baka may marereto kayo sakin, pagsubmitin ng resume with at least 3 character references tapos dapat may picture, and include a short essay on why you are still single..email to eweeka@gmail.com haha charowt!
announcement pala, i'm not using my smart number anymore, dahil wala na akong sapat na rason para magsmart..landline and globe's still in use dun nyo ko contact..another thing, Aikalog is down..may nakahack ata ng acct ko at kung anuano ang pinost..i'ma announce kung kelan sya mag-uup ulit, most probably papalitan ko url dito nalang siguro ulit sa blogspot..pasensya sa mga nagbabasa, itutuloy rin natin ang kwentuhan next time..busy rin kasi ngayon eh,churee!
aika logged at6:18 PM
♥ profile
Name: Erika Bautista
Nickname: Erika, Aika, Aiks/Aix, Ekai, Nikai
Birthdate: April 29
School: Philippine School of Business Administration
Email: eweeka@gmail.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/aikababy
Twitter: http://twitter.com/aikabeebee
♥ loves
those who love me
those who hate me
movies
parties
arcade
shopping
singing
dancing
ice cream
french fries
rain
♥ Hates
posers
stalkers
veggies
plastic people
jejemons
liars and cheaters
♥ He is my only desire. ♥
Guess who!!
He's not the guy you fall in love at first sight, but he's the guy that you fall head over heels for.